Simple pleasures?

I spent half hr at Times Sq last night and I realized that sometimes the smallest things in life can give you so much happiness and satisfaction. Little things like watching people and the craziness around you can make you realize that you don't need to spend money, or you don't need a big group of people to have fun. We are so engrossed in our daily lives that we miss the obvious! We don't realize what we have and where we are...

why do we do what we do?

I am wondering today why we spend so much energy, time and effort on doing something that neither gives us satisfaction nor a stress-free life..sometimes we just go with the flow without realizing that there is a need for change. The change doesn't need to be a transformation!! Maybe change means to stop and re-think - what is my purpose? what is the meaning in what I'm doing? maybe just giving yourself a reality check!!

try try try

its one of those times when you have reached a dead end...im tiring away...trying to keep someone happy...making an effort to overcome my shortcomings...trying to make them feel better in every which way...trying not to get frustrated...trying to hide my moods...trying to keep smiling...trying to hide my emotions...not being able to express myself freely...expressing myself freely means more fighting and screaming...shutting up means a more frustrated me...i have reached a crossroad - i make a left turn, i reach a dead end..i make a right turn, i reach a dead end...maybe it's time to let go?

Only "change" is permanent

I'll tell you a short story. I have a friend with whom I shared everything. I spent a majority of my time with her. We studied together, hung out together, we had common friends, we went on vacations together, we cooked together, we organized parties together, we struggled together - we were roommates for a long time. We are the best of friends. We shared good times and bad times together. We have seen and known each other so closely that we can read each others' mind. There is a day in my life I fear. The day when we wont be able to do all those things together, that we always did. The day we will be forced to move on with our own lives. Not to say that we wont be the best of friends or that we will move away from each other. But, our life's decisions or actions will eventually absorb us in our own responsibilities and keep us busy...although I know that we will always be best friends and always be there for each other.

I have another friend who was with me during one of my hardest times. He helped me think straight, he advised me, he motivated me, he helped me move on. He spent time with me, hung out with me. There was one day I feared - the day all this would stop. He got married - he had new responsibilities, new roles to play. It kept him busy. We still remain good friends.

And I have another friend who I talk to everyday and all the time. We have fun conversations, we have serious conversations, we talk about our daily lives, we share our experiences. Similar to past experiences, I know there will be a day when we won't be talking to each other everyday. We wont be sharing our experiences all the time. Should I fear that day? Maybe not, from past experiences. But I do....although I know we will always be good friends.

I tell myself - this is how life is gonna be. It feels like standing still in the middle of crowded and busy Times Sq. This is what it is for everyone. It's a given. You meet people during the course of your life whom you get really close to and then it's time to move on. Some stay forever. Some don't - I feel bad to see them go but I also realize that for as long as it lasted, it felt good. And that's what I need to cherish. I wish it was that easy to rule the heart!!

Never have I ever!

I dont always want to be the mature one. I dont want to be the wise one always handing out wisdom. I am only human, not super human. I want to be taken care of too. I want to be pampered for a change. I know this seems immature of me. But sometimes, everyone needs to be a baby -
with your mom
or your dad
or your sibling
or your friend
or your boyfriend/girlfriend
or your husband/wife

Rise Up!

Sometimes all you need is enthusiasm! It is hard to motivate yourself when you are down in the dumps but just a little bit of zest in anything you do - be it organizing a party or meeting a friend or discovering a new idea at work...it can help in raising your spirits! So remember to add that wee bit of excitement!

The First Few....

It has been 6 years since I was in the dating scene, thanks to a long relationship that ended last year. After 6 long years, it feels like I have forgotten all the aspects of dating!! The excitement in getting to know someone, dressing up for a date, talking for hours not knowing how time passes, being pampered and fussed around, feeling special. Sure, can be exciting. After all, isn't that the fun part of being in a relationship?

New York, I love you

New York - what can I say. Heat. Cold. Snow. Rain. Sunshine. Crowded trains. Sidewalks that soon will need traffic rules. Tourists. Artists. Photographers. White-collared professionals. Investment Bankers. Street vendors. Louis Vitton knock-offs. Style. Fashion. And the list goes on...It makes you happy, it makes you sad. It makes you excited, it makes you dull. New York - what can I say, I truly love you!

Love...is there an alternative word?

I think its the best example for an emotion that has both pain and joy. So beautiful at times, that you are addicted to it. With the same intensity, an emotion that is filled with pain.

When beautiful, love can make you keep going back. But when painful, can make you wanna leave everything you already have.

A feeling so intense...difficult to describe..

Icing on the cake!

We always crave to have everything in life. There are two sides to a coin. If you want joy, you get pain along with that. But none of us want the pain, we just want the joy..the cake and the icing on it too!! It never works that way..does it?!

There are many ways of looking at it. If you start accepting the fact that its a flip sided coin, then you know what to expect. But if you wanna remain in the state of rejection, then you gotta make a choice...do u wanna suffer the pain for the joy? or do you wanna sacrifice the joy because u don wanna go through the pain?

"To be, or not to be: that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them? To die: to sleep;
No more; and by a sleep to say we end
The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to, 'tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wish'd. To die, to sleep;
To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there's the rub;
For in that sleep of death what dreams may come
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause: there's the respect
That makes calamity of so long life;
For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
The oppressor's wrong, the proud man's contumely,
The pangs of despised love, the law's delay,
The insolence of office and the spurns
That patient merit of the unworthy takes,
When he himself might his quietus make
With a bare bodkin? who would fardels bear,
To grunt and sweat under a weary life,
But that the dread of something after death,
The undiscover'd country from whose bourn
No traveller returns, puzzles the will
And makes us rather bear those ills we have
Than fly to others that we know not of?
Thus conscience does make cowards of us all;
And thus the native hue of resolution
Is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought,
And enterprises of great pith and moment
With this regard their currents turn awry,
And lose the name of action. - Soft you now!
The fair Ophelia! Nymph, in thy orisons
Be all my sins remember'd."

Another way if looking at it...imagine a life that was always happy and beautiful. If that were to be, then life would probably be boring and we probably wouldnt have the chance to appreciate the things that are the way they are. We feel the joy only because we feel the pain. We know the difference between the two. When you're in pain, you're just waiting for that moment when everything will be over and you can be happy again. And when you're happy, you can expect that it might not stay that way forever.

In the end, I think its the way you look at it...

When was the last time life was fun for a long time?

Hmmm...its definitely been a long time. The last time I realllyyyy had lots of fun was back in college...during my undergrad. Life was much simpler - just enough money to buy a Rs. 2 coffee in the canteen, few close friends to hang out with and few other passersby. We had the freedom to attend the classes we want and miss those that we didnt care about! And yeah...bunking classes was so much fun!!

I still know the people I knew in college, but only in a different way. We were 19-yr olds back then. Now we all get older and life has gotten more complicated. When ppl are younger, its easier to get along. The older we get, we all have our own opinions and we become quite rigid making it harder to get along with each other.

I guess its because there is less and less of the child in us and more of the adult in us...

Why

why things are the way they are, i always wonder. whats right and whats wrong...i have no clue! making decisions is the hardest. And when that's done..the swaying feelings remain..about whether it was the right thing to do or not. The right choice is always harder, isnt it, but its gotta be done...

I have seen and met so many ppl who just live their lives without any worries, without giving a damn about ppl around them. Might seem inhuman at times, but what they hell, they are only helping themselves!!

While I keep wondering why things are the way they are, I hope ppl are finding the answers they are looking for and I sure hope I find an answer someday!